Book Riff

Good Ones

To be Daringly Vulnerable

CJ Westerberg, March 22, 2013 5:38 PM

Skydive.jpg

 ". . .and I will always hold sacred the gift of seeing you."
- Dr. Brene Brown

Wholehearted Parenting Manifesto Below
TED video below - Dr. Brene Brown


Daring-Greatly.jpgThe book I'm reading, Daring Greatly:
How the Courage to be Vulnerable Transforms
the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead
includes a wonderful parenting manifesto that we are featuring below, in case you missed it.  It was written by Dr. Brene Brown who thinks that every family should have their own. I agree with this sentiment but this is one hard act to follow, so here is an example where plagiarism is acceptable for your personal remix, folks.

By the way, this book is not just about parenting as the title suggests.

One of the chapters is Disruptive Engagement: Daring to Rehumanize Education and Work which talks about finger-pointing as a tool to manipulate and control students instilling fear
of failure and shame. Also, fear of real feedback
is another issue discussed.

With so much value being placed about being in-control when we are so not, it is a refreshingfear.feedback.jpg topic and perspective and one I look forward to reading and thinking about more. Not surprisingly, Sir Ken Robinson double dares us to read this book ;)

"I Don't Do Vulnerable"
- Amazon reviewer
 

On a related note, the last line of the manifesto below channels the late great educator,
Ted Sizer.  Here, from a previous TDR post, "Sizer believed that to be influential educators, teachers must know the child. In a speech given at the 1999 CES Fall Forum, he said, 'We must learn to see young people whole and to craft schools which address their reality.'"                                                                                                      - C.J. Westerberg


The Wholehearted Parenting Manifesto

Above all else, I want you to know that you are loved and loveable.

You will learn this from my words and actions - the lessons on love
are in how I treat you and how I treat myself.


I want you to engage with the world from a place of worthiness.

You will learn that you are worthy of love, belonging, and joy every time you see me practice self-compassion and embrace my own imperfections.

We will practice courage in our family by showing up, letting
ourselves be seen, and honoring vulnerability. We will share our stories of struggle and strength. There will always be room in our home for both.


We will teach you compassion by practicing compassion with ourselves first; then with each other. We will set and respect boundaries; we will honor hard work, hope, and perseverance.
Rest and play will be family values, as well as family practices.


You will learn accountability and respect by watching me make mistakes and make amends, and by watching how I ask for what I need and talk about how I feel. 

I want you to know joy, so together we will practice gratitude.

I want you to feel joy, so together we will learn how to be vulnerable.

When uncertainty and scarcity visit, you will be able to draw from the spirit that is a part of our everyday life.

Together we will cry and face fear and grief. I will want to take away your pain, but instead I will sit with you and teach you how to feel it.

We will laugh and sing and dance and create. We will always have permission to be ourselves with each other. No matter what, you will always belong here.

As you begin your Wholehearted journey, the greatest gift that I can give to you is to live and love with my whole heart and to dare greatly.

I will not teach or love or show you anything perfectly, but I will let you see me, and I will always hold sacred the gift of seeing you. Truly, deeply, seeing you.

Reprinted from Daring Greatly by BrenĂˆ Brown by arrangement with Gotham Books, a member of Penguin Group (USA) Inc., Copyright (c) 2012


 

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